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Page 6 of 7
T minus 21 Days….
We just had an amazing weekend. One of the best since our arrival. Part of me thinks it is partially because we know that we are leaving soon. Regardless, it was a very special time. We were invited to go to Kruger National Park with our couch surfer friend, Prisca, and her sister visiting from Reunion Island, Lydie. We are so glad they did. Firstly, Prisca made all the arrangements, which was nice as I am the planner in our family, so I didn’t have to do it.
We left on Friday morning. We stopped at Billy’s for lunch. Outside of the service, this was a good place to stop. We stopped in Sabie and got dinner and food for breakfast. Then we rested for the night. Tim and Prisca took turns driving. He did quite well. The next morning, we headed to Kruger. It was amazing. We drove and drove and drove. It was so nice to see a Mama and baby elephant walk across the street. The park was massive. There were people everywhere.
Tim will write more later. I am just overwhelmed by the experience and had to put pen to paper.
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Cradle of Humankind
This blog entry will be two-fold. It will serve to tell you about a very moving trip we took while in South Africa and will also be an excerpt from my forthcoming book. I’m not sure how it will all fit but here goes…
Standing on a bench looking out over Gauteng Province and all its beauty…
She asks me a question. “What is your why?”
Immediately and without hesitation, my response was, “You.”
We were at the Cradle of Humankind in Maropeng, South Africa. A place I call the most inspirational and educational place on the planet. It is carved into an open landscape of immense beauty. Rolling lush green hills surrounded by mountains, unique trees, and capped with the bluest skies I have ever seen. We learned quite a bit about the human genome, the formation of the planet, and the emergence of mankind. As one of our friends told us. “You cannot emerge from there unchanged.” We can now attest that it is very true. While there, we marveled, we laughed, we learned, and we cried.
There was a confluence of events that prompted this question. We were in this place marinating in the awesomeness of We Are One. Plus, we had recently watched the movie Collateral Beauty. A very moving film that touched both of our souls. There are a few lines in it that spoke to us. “What is your why” and “I am the only why …Don’t try to live without me.”
The “Why” is what gets you out of bed in the morning. Why you make the choices you do and the catalyst for them are three simple things. Love, time, and death. So Leigh’s question caught me by surprise but not unaware. After watching the movie I had some time to digest and analyze what does it for me. Hince the ability to fire off the answer so quickly.
Please be patient I have been known to go off on wordy tangents and this will be no exception. I promise it will all be tied in and relevant soon enough.
At my core, I am a coach. First, I was a player and that defined me for a while. After my playing days were over, football (American style) was in my blood and to stay close to the game, I began to coach it. My style was simple. All out as fast as you can and never be afraid to take a risk! Develop cohesive units by creating a family atmosphere and eschew the conventional wisdom that says don’t get so close to players because one day you may have to cut them. It was a labor of love. For years, I honed my craft and had fun doing it.
After a particularly grueling and in-depth meeting with my players, where I revealed the impact that my father (not actually telling me the words he loved me until I was 18) had on me and it’s meaning to my relationships, a player asked me how do you reveal your feelings to someone you feel that way about. My honest answer at the time was “I will let you know.” I think that day is finally here…
If I could time travel, I would go back to that evening leaving the field and explain it to them in football terms, just as I had to digest it, and undoubtedly the best way for them to understand it.
You are a gifted athlete with the ability to make people miss you in small spaces. What you need to explain this feeling, however, is what you use when the sideline is unavailable and contact is unavoidable. The Intestinal fortitude to grip the ball tightly and let your shoulder pads lead the way. Add to that, the discipline of a rush end that must take on a block with their outside shoulder free to set the edge. Knowing they have to trust the linebacker to fill the gap if the play is to be successful. Further, still, you have to be as selfless and humble as an offensive lineman doing their thankless work while someone else gets all the credit and glory. These are the ingredients needed to open oneself up to a place that all your emotions can be laid bare for the world to see and not care that you are exposed. You must be willing to take the risk that you are “all in” and on a highwire without a safety net!
All this to understand that Love is the biggest why!
As we stand in this place looking at the life-like renderings of early homo sapiens. I cannot help but ask the question. What drove them to succeed? What made them continue to exist under such hostile circumstances?
My suspicion is what the movie called the only why (SPOILER ALERT) “Love”. Maybe they could not explain it as easily as we do now but I have no doubt that brothers back then loved each other as much as I love my younger brother David now! Whose embrace I can still feel from our farewell before we took this journey! I wonder if he knows that he is my hero? Well, I suppose if he is reading this he does now. I am sure they also felt the same love I feel for his wife, Paula, my chosen sister. (We don’t do the inlaw thing in my family). She is the definition of the word “woman” in my book! I am sure back then they loved their sisters as much as I love mine. Delma, who is quickly becoming the glue that ties our little family unit together as we transition from the children to the elders, and Ruby whose strength, intelligence, and character, I admire from afar. I know for sure that they loved their children as much as I love my son, Tim Jr., and would do any and everything to ensure his survival! They had to have loved the laughter of their grandchildren as I do mine. What would be the purpose of securing a future otherwise? They had to feel love for all the uncles, aunts, nieces, nephews, cousins and those close to the family unit!
So stepping down off that bench after saying those words, “You are my why” the emotion between us was palpable. No words were spoken but none were needed. Later we enjoyed a late lunch at the Tumulus restaurant, an on-site restaurant with great food, service and a breathtaking view of the surrounding landscape. In this place, it was easy to tell Leigh why she is my why. Loving her is what gets me out of bed in the morning. She is the reason why I strive for excellence in all the things I do. She is the reason why I long to feel love, why I wish for more time, and why I fear death.
We Are One is a common theme throughout this blog. It is something that I have always felt as a human being or citizen of humanity as I like to say. It is one thing to have a feeling of something and it is quite another to have it confront you with absolutely no room for escaping it or leave to ignore it.
This project, through science, highlights the fact that you are 99.9% the same as any person standing next to you no matter where on the planet they are from. Collectively our genes are known as a genome. Our genomes contain about 20,000 genes, each of which contains instructions for building different proteins. Our bodies functions rely on proteins. With such a large number of genes its easy to see how only a 0.01% difference is responsible for our uniqueness. There are no races, We are all connected and my estimation is the way forward is more of the same way we arrived at this space and time…LOVE!
Till next time
Peace and Blessings
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Fourways Farmers Market
One of the distinct pleasures we have grown to love here in Jozi is the abundance of open air markets. On this particular Sunday, we were invited to the Fourways Farmers’ Market to wish a fond farewell to our friend, Paulina, who was moving to Germany permanently. Paulina is another dear friend that we met from our network of couch surfer friends. We love this group and all the people it has placed us in contact with! (Leigh here, we hope the CS group in the States is as vibrant and social as this one. We plan to be very active.)
It was an absolutely beautiful Sunday! Sun shining, temperate weather, and general good feeling all around. A day where the possibilities seemed endless. We met up with Akosua…need I tell you, another couch surfer friend? We just love this group! She was waiting for us at the gate. We paid the 10 Rand each entrance fee which comes out to about 75 cents US and away we went. It was a cleverly designed space. A fenced entryway led down a path covered with lush green trees forming a canopy of sorts. Just enough sun, just enough shade… Akosua had been here before so we had a guide. The space was large enough to explore but not so large that one would feel overwhelmed! The pathways were clearly marked and the signage was really funny.
We opted for food first. It was just a bit too early for day drinking per Leigh and Akosua. Ummmm, it is always evening at some place in the world and who am I to let down those good folk who hate drinking alone. (Leigh again, I think he just admitted to being a drunk. Gotcha!) If you are following the blog you know and understand my love affair with a good drink and no explanation is needed. (YEP!) There are many tasty looking places offering food and again Leigh and I are foodies to the core so there comes a point where places like this become sensory overload and it’s both exciting and frustrating trying to make a decision on what to partake in. (You can say that again. It was Low-Carb-Be-Damned Day)
We settled on a dish we have never tried or even heard of…Woodstock Waffles. Mannnnn! You can actually order breakfast…wrapped in the waffle! A choice of savory or sweet selections caused momentary indecision. Again with the too many good options…We both ended up going the savory route… They were awesome by the way. We had to share because…well…we just have to have variety in our lives. Plus she makes me…don’t judge (Don’t listen to him, he likes it).
With food now in hand, we headed off to find a place to sit and eat, which was an adventure unto itself. There was picnic-styled seating under cover of trees that was nice and intimate, however, that place was first-come, first serve and you couldn’t really reserve seating. Needless to say, that spot was the most desirable and it filled up fast. For the spill over, which our farewell party would be, there were complete tree stumps of varying heights and widths lying around in another section conveniently located between two of the drinking locations! Hooray for us! Luckily there were 3 seats/stumps available when we arrived. Our numbers would grow to 16 and as fate would have it, people would leave just as others were arriving and everyone found a place to sit and gather around Paulina to grab a bite and/or a drink and bid her farewell!
There were many micro brews there which happened to be heaven for me (Notice a pattern?) So over the course of several hours, we got to sample lots of drinks…well mostly me but our favorite was a Cran-Apple ale. Please forgive me for not acquiring the name from the vendor. I know it is poor form on my part but it was delicious and three of them will set you free… so to speak. I know what you are thinking and three of them did not cause me not to remember. I simply never asked for the name of the company from the vendor. They were selling a host of brews from different companies … sensory overload thing again! (Sure it was Boo! Tee Hee Hee)
Fourways Market was the perfect place to host this event. It was great meeting all of you and sharing a few hours with the woman of the day! We wish Paulina safe travels and all the best in her new life.
“You will always be a child of South Africa and a product of Ubuntu! It shows on your face and everything you do! We love you!”
South African Road Trip!
So we have been in Jozi since September and this day had to come. Growing up, a child of the south, driving was a must. Nothing is particularly close and parents look forward to the day when they no longer have to ferry children around to events or make a quick run to the store. Learning to drive usually comes at 16 for most southern teens, a rite-of-passage, if you will. For me, it was even earlier. Tractors for tilling soil, and minding tobacco farms and such. I tell you this so that you know the confidence that I have behind the wheel of a vehicle. (Leigh here, he has also been riding motorcycles since forever.)
I have alluded to the fact that in South Africa, they drive on the left side of the road and I freely admit that it gave me some trepidation. Therefore, I would have to test my metal on the open road driving on said left side and the last week of 2016 was just that test.
Charlene Harry, our dear friend, invited us to spend a couple of days in the town of her youth, Howick, South Africa. A mere 5-hour journey from our current dwelling in Marshalltown. The ever prepared Leigh, booked us a rental car for the journey and at my request secured an automatic seeing as this would be my first foray into right-sided driving on the left side of the road. We thought it would be prudent to not have to worry about shifting gears and such. We arrived on time for our scheduled pick up just a bit nervous but eager to travel outside of Johannesburg for the first time since our arrival four months ago (Wow! Has it been that long??) As we had been told by everyone here, South Africans work for 11 months out of the year and really go on holiday for the 12th. There were no automatic rental cars available! I know what you are thinking … We were thinking the same thing … But we made a reservation! Grrrrrr…. Moot point and after some searching for another vehicle in our price range (there were none), we decided to take the manual and be on our way.
First let me say that I am a really safe driver (cough, cough). I do tend to speed at times (Did he really say…at times??) but within 5 mph of the posted speed limit (no comment) unless I’m on my bike then all bets are off! Fate decided to test me to the max this day for some reason or another. The drive started out fine. It was an exercise in self-conversation and Leigh’s gentle reminding …LEFT SIDE…Left side. Turning left it was not such a big deal. It was the right turns that required maximum concentration. Before we go any further, I am happy to report that the vehicle was returned with all its original paint! Once we were well under way, it began to rain. Hummmmm. A bit further into the trip noticed a sign reading, “Severe penalties for any traffic infraction.” Further still, I realized we would be traversing a mountainous area ….Outstanding! The “white knuckle ” moment came rounding a bend on a four-lane portion of the N3 highway. it is a blind curve and yes, I was well within the posted speed limit. I guess here it is common for highways NOT to be separated by medians. This was news to me. As we were rounding the bend…in the rain…with a stick shift…the lanes narrowed and it appeared to me as if the driver of the on-coming semi had crossed the non-existing median and was in my lane! As it turns out he was simply in his lane that was about a foot from my door! Inside I was having a ” Chris Tucker” moment.
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Outwardly, I had to exhale because Leigh was struggling for air! Sorry honey I didn’t intend to take all the oxygen as I gasped. (It’s okay, Boo Boo.) At any rate, once that moment passed, I settled in and managed to keep us in one piece the rest of the drive. (He did GREAT!)
This drive, once my nerves returned to a somewhat normal state, was amazing! The country side was filled with visual treasures. Wide open expanses, meandering rivers, lakes, soft peaked mountains, and wandering wildlife, all feasts for the eyes or eye in my case…I was not about to be caught unawares whilst driving on the left side! Other, more subtle difference began to emerge along the way. In the U.S. when you see a fueling station / rest stop, it is on one side of the highway or the other. Here there are two. One on each side. Same station, same stores just one on each side. And those stations are full service…I mean they check the oil, air, and fill the tank.
(Unfortunately, the options are limited on each side as well. I know…spolied American.)
Hitching a ride is a way of life here. We talked about the taxi’s and the hand signs given to show where you would like to go in a prior post. Here is one on display. I know its not the best photo but its the best we could do at 100 kilometers per hr…. and yes I was going exactly that! We found it interesting that some chose this method of travel rather than purchasing a vehicle but they do. Somehow they always find a ride. That would be maddening for me but here it all works! (Interestingly enough, it is not always economic reasons. Some hitch hike out of necessity, but some just choose to do it.)
The only damper on our 5-day excursion was the weather. It was overcast and rainy most of the trip but still very restful and enjoyable! We stayed at Matt’s Rest B&B and Self Catering. Our room was quaint and cozy. The staff was excellent. They treated us like old friends returning for a visit and saw to our every need. The breakfasts were cooked to order and delicious. An all around great place to recharge your batteries!
I am smitten by that smile! (He is so sweet, ya’ll)
The highlight of this adventure came on Wednesday. We met up with Charlene and her childhood friend, Mpume, to tour the best of KwaZulu-Natal!
They called it the Meander, a stretch of highway and back roads that included: little specialty shops of Belgian Chocolates and Honey, an outdoor shopping center called Piggly Wiggly, Howick falls and best of all “The Capture site.” While I am sure most everyone has heard the story of Nelson Mandela, I’m not quite sure everyone knows the story of his life before his imprisonment and his impact on life in South Africa. This museum does an excellent job of bringing that out. It is both an emotional and inspiring place to visit and we highly recommend stopping by if you are ever here! It was mind blowing to me to be standing on the very ground that President Mandela was captured so many years ago and the chain of events that followed. This all happened 3 years before I was born.
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(Say Cheese!)
(We were trying to be cute…lol)
Final Countdown
Mornings
Having decided to move my exercise regimen to the first thing in the morning to make it more consistent… no waiting to the end of the day to get it done and letting myself off the hook because it’s late. This was the first morning I got to witness this city awaken at 6:30 in the am. Here, the city is serene and peaceful. Hardly anyone on the streets with the exception of a few workers heading to early opening businesses. Most everyone that works here lives outside the city’s borders and in about 20 minutes, it would be a completely different story. Taxis and other vehicles begin to flood the streets. Sidewalks begin to fill with people starting their own busy days. By 7:15, it is the normal full blown chaos of a typical municipality.
The city roars to life with all the sights and sounds one can imagine. Horns blowing, construction machinery lumber comes to life, and the deep tones of bus engines humming along as they ferry passengers to their destinations. But in the still of my morning walk, the rhythmic tunes of birds songing coupled with the flapping of wings made their own melody. A few more blocks and off in the distance, I could hear the hypnotic whalings of the Islamic call to prayer. I had heard them before on recordings but this was live and in person. Translated… God is good… God is great…come to prayer. Astonishing in its simplicity but soul moving in its impact. It was impressive, to say the least.
I was alone in my thoughts. Appreciative of the fact that my better half had finally made it back home safely over the weekend. Leigh had to travel back to the U.S. for a week to work and as the travel Gods would have it, let’s just say it was not a particularly smooth endeavor. Needless to say, it caused me quite a few hours of stress. This morning’s exercise with the calm release that it provided, was just what the doctor ordered to set my world back on it’s axis. We are very seldom apart and I am always a bit off kilter without her within arms reach. Such is life however and I want to make the most of my alone time so I don’t get too depressed missing my beloved.
It was nice to gallop through the city and take the time to appreciate some of the architecture at the city’s center. Huge archways on old buildings. Quiet spaces for sitting. Artists sculptures for visual pleasures. All of this provided a tapestry that seemed to be gleaned from the imagination of a master impressionist of the 1800’s. Once alive, the rhythm of Johannesburg is palpable. A constant driving beat of a city on the uptick. A synergistic collage of old world meets technology and the child it would spawn. The people are friendly and usually greet you with a smile and a friendly hello or Sawubona when I am taken for a local! Not so different from my hometown in North Carolina, only on a much larger scale.
I think we are going to enjoy these morning jaunts when Leigh returns. It has been a little over 4 months since our arrival and Johannesburg still captures my imagination. It is still not exactly home but it remains a wonderful place to be!
Hurry home honey! I miss you bunches! Admit it you miss her witty interjections too, her usually bashing me for something or other, no doubt. No worries. She will be back to grace the pages of this blog before you know it.
Till next time
Peace and Blessings
Comment & Share
Peace and Blessings
Comment & Share
Musings: The Right to Believe
There is no communication more true than that between you and your idea of a greater power. It could be God, the laws of nature, or a multitude of deities. Even atheists find their own way to conne…
Source: Musings: The Right to Believe
Neighbourgoods Market, Soweto, and the Perfect day!
As I have told you before, I am a child of the south. Born and raised in Durham, North Carolina. A small southern town just north of the capital city of Raleigh. The things I hear about Durham sometimes gets my red up. Like how it is “unsafe” and so crime riddled that realtors sometimes avoid showing properties to prospective clients there because the reputation is so bad. Nothing could be further from the truth. It is all a matter of perspective. We won’t go into any details as to why I believe this to be so. I will simply say every city has its good and bad and Durham is no different. I lay all of this out to tell you of a similar situation here in Jozi.
We had been warned repeatedly, ” stay away from the Nelson Mandela bridge.” It is a high crime area and stories of people being mugged are readily available for visitors to hear from locals all the time. Needless to say, when this day had come for us to possibly be walking across it, I had some hesitation. Trying to be cautious and minimize risk, I listened. Then the thought occurred to me, what if it is like Durham? Hmmm. We will just have to test this theory today…
Leigh had planned to meet up with some former students at a place called Neighbourgood Market in the Braamfontein area of Johannesburg. It is just over the Nelson Mandela Bridge from Marshalltown, where we now live. It was a 20 min walk and we would have to travel through the outskirts of the C.B.D. (central business district ) where it is supposedly the most sketchy. It turned out to be a pleasant walk actually. Were there some places where the infrastructure left something to be desired? Yes. But not more so than any other burgeoning metropolis. The most off-putting thing we encountered was the sight of severed cows limbs out on full display of the public being sold. I, having raised swine til slaughter in my youth, was unaffected. Leigh, on the other hand…Well, let’s just say it proved a bit much for her and we hurried away as she regained her composure.
What we actually saw was the entrepreneurial spirit at its highest level. People with small cookers offering up freshly cooked delicacies and vendors manning fresh fruits and vegetable stands. Odds and ends, cigarettes, and you name it could all be purchased at reasonable prices. Quite simply people trying to make an honest living. All within about a 3 block radius. Was it crowded? Sure? Reminded me of New York’s time square any time of the year. Without the big bright lights, of course. The Same feel, however. Fears assuaged and really unfounded. A little bit of shame set in as I reflected back to my feelings towards how my hometown is portrayed and how I let the opinions of others shape my view of this place… Never again.
We met up with two of Leigh’s former students who had actually suggested this place as a must-see of Jo’burg. Thank you Zandile and Makamohelo!!!! The Neighbourgoods Market is a vibrant place. It is much like the Arts on Main shopping complex we frequented while living in Maboneng. Just on a larger scale. There were vendors there of all types! Food, clothing, soaps, trinkets, and all sorts of other delights you can imagine. It would take the majority of the afternoon to decide what to eat and limit the number of things we could purchase. Only so much room in the suitcases for the return trip and the limited budget dictates we stay as disciplined as possible … but it is so hard cause there is so much we wanted to purchase.
This trip, we limited our purchases to Soap, turkey legs, burgers, and drinks! The soap came from “Just Limani,” a local shop that makes its soaps from all organic ingredients and infuses theme with heavenly scents. We purchased vanilla and orange both very lovely scents and can’t wait to try them out.
Leigh and I purchased burgers from two different vendors that were side by side. Since we couldn’t figure out which was the best, we decided to get what appeared to be the best burger on each menu and share both. This proved to be an outstanding idea because both were good, however, Cadillac Jack’s Asian burger carried the day … still having a moment over the flavor filled explosion of a party I had in my mouth!
On to drinks and some serious people watching. There was such an eclectic mix of folks there all sharing in the good life. A rooftop full of people enjoying the day and sharing stories and time with one another. We took pictures and handed out contact cards and mingled with one another for hours and it was all great fun. We are all connected was that general feel of Ubuntu that keeps reoccurring in these posts.
We have been wanting to get back to Soweto before we returned to the US and as the Universe would have it, today proved to be that opportunity. Leigh’s former students were having a get-together and we were invited to tag along. We got to take our first bus ride here. Not really a lot to tell there. Public transportation is the same all over the world I guess. Buses filled to capacity, the mad scramble for a seat or a solid place to stand and hold on for dear life as you round corners at what feels like too fast a pace. The thoughts of “we can’t possibly fit another person in here” as we near another stop, and yet somehow it all works out!
Bus ride concluded and finally at Thokoza Park. The highlight of the day for me happened upon Leigh’s arrival. It was such a joy for me to watch the interaction between these students and their professor, Leigh Lester-Holmes. Some knew she was coming and others did not. To watch these wonderfully bright students wait patiently their turn to hug Leigh and have a few moments of face to face time with someone who impacted their lives so. Someone whom they never thought they would ever get the chance to meet! To watch men revere and respect a female, and to watch women get to touch a female that they held in such high regard was amazing to me. First just simply overwhelmed at the outpouring of affection for this woman that I love so dearly, then moved, almost to tears as it sets in that others see and value what I see in this big-hearted force of nature that is Leigh!
I have my own point of reference for this feeling she has but that is a story for another day. This moment is hers and I lovingly look on as she basks in the glow of students that adore her. This day could not have been any more perfect!
Til Next time
Peace and Blessings
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